Taylor Expansion Goes Brrr

The mighty Atlas of physics! That single electron shouldering the burden of all human civilization is the unsung hero of existence. Without these subatomic workhorses, we'd literally fall apart faster than my funding applications. The electron—weighing about 0.00000000000000000000000000091 kg—supports everything from your smartphone to your neural activity. Talk about an efficiency model we should all aspire to! Next time you're complaining about your workload, remember this little negative particle carrying the weight of human existence while being roughly 1/1836 the mass of a proton. No wonder it looks tired.

The ultimate temporal paradox that Einstein never warned us about! Instead of finding your wise future self with lottery numbers and stock tips, you discover you've been MIA for three decades. Turns out time travel doesn't create alternate timelines—it just creates extremely long, unexplained absences. The real tragedy? Your 401k would have been magnificent if you'd just stayed put. This is basically the scientific equivalent of leaving to get milk and never coming back, except you're both the leaver and the wait-er. The grandfather paradox has nothing on the "missing person report" paradox!

Engineers round it up to 2 because "close enough for practical purposes." Statisticians approximate it to 1.7 because decimals are just suggestions. Physicists calculate it to five decimal places because they're sooo precise. And then there's mathematicians... *maniacal laughter* PURE CHAOS! They're having an existential crisis because √3 is an irrational number that continues FOREVER without pattern! They can't even write it down completely! It's just... itself! The mathematical equivalent of "it is what it is" but with infinitely more screaming!

Chemistry majors forming strong bonds with physics majors while simultaneously hating chemistry is the perfect example of cognitive dissonance in the wild. Like watching someone who despises coffee clutching their fifth espresso of the day. The real chemistry experiment is happening in their brains as they try to reconcile these contradictory positions without spontaneously combusting.

The historical rivalry between Tesla and Edison just got a modern upgrade! This brilliant wordplay hinges on the fact that Thomas Edison was Nikola Tesla's famous rival and competitor in the "War of Currents." Tesla pioneered AC (alternating current) while Edison pushed DC (direct current). So when your Tesla car gets stolen, it's literally no longer in your current possession - making it an "Edison" because the electricity and the car have been... direct-ly taken from you! The shower thought that sparked this joke deserves a Nobel Prize in Comedy Physics.

Electricity's spiciest family drama! The Amp is literally stuck in a circuit with Ohm giving resistance from above while desperately calling on its stepbrother Volt for help. This is basically Ohm's Law (V=IR) reimagined as an electrical soap opera where voltage, current, and resistance are caught in a dysfunctional relationship. The Amp needs more voltage to overcome the resistance, but Ohm is just sitting there being all resistive and judgmental. Every electrical engineer has flashbacks to this exact scenario during troubleshooting!