Biomimicry: When Engineers Get Shellfish About Speed

Evolution had 3.5 billion years to figure out locomotion, and here's this dude in bed having an existential crisis about wheels! 🤣 The perfect example of that midnight "I'm-so-smart" thought that gets shut down with the relationship equivalent of "Sir, this is a Wendy's." Wheels may be efficient on smooth surfaces, but try rolling up a tree or across a swamp! Nature actually optimized for adaptability over efficiency—legs can climb, jump, swim, and don't need roads. Plus, biological wheels would need some wild rotating joint with blood vessels that somehow... disconnect and reconnect? Talk about engineering nightmare! Meanwhile, his partner is just trying to sleep through another one of his 2AM biology revelations.

The button-smashing decision is crystal clear! Training astronauts to drill takes years of specialized education, but grabbing oil riggers who already know how to drill and giving them a crash course in "don't touch that in space" is engineering efficiency at its finest. NASA probably watched Armageddon and thought "wait, that's actually brilliant." Classic engineering solution: why reinvent the drill when you can just strap a spacesuit on someone who already knows which end goes into the ground? Honestly, this is the same logic that got us duct tape on Apollo 13 - pragmatism always wins in a crisis!

The only screw head shown is the Torx—and it's labeled "the fan favorite." Meanwhile, all the other boxes are empty with personality types like "Made to be hated" and "The gremlin." This is basically the engineering equivalent of zodiac signs. Every engineer has a visceral reaction to different fastener types that borders on religious fervor. Phillips heads strip at the slightest provocation, flat heads were clearly designed by someone who hates humanity, and don't get me started on those proprietary Apple screws. The Torx truly is the chosen one—providing actual grip without shredding your screwdriver or your sanity. Engineers will fight to the death over this stuff while normal people back slowly out of the room.

The engineering hierarchy in its natural habitat. Mechanical and aerospace engineers pretending civil engineers don't exist, while simultaneously terrorizing them with Newton's Second Law. F=ma≠0 is apparently the engineering equivalent of showing a horror movie to a toddler. Meanwhile, civil engineers are just trying to build bridges without getting bullied about their fear of moving objects. Classic STEM food chain dynamics.

Engineers and physicists living in completely different realities! The engineer wants to simplify calculations by rounding gravity to 10m/s² (actual value ~9.8) and π to 3.14 (actual value 3.14159...), and the physicist is having an existential crisis. To a physicist, those constants are SACRED TEXTS! It's like suggesting we round the speed of light to "about 300 million m/s, give or take." The horror! The blasphemy! Next thing you know, someone will suggest Planck's constant is "roughly zero" and the physicist will need therapy.

The eternal academic caste system on full display! Physicists looking down on engineers with that unmistakable "I derive the equations, you just use them" expression. Pure theoretical superiority in human form. The hierarchy is real - physicists discover the laws of nature, engineers merely apply them, and Juan... well, Juan's just trying to pass Intro to Mechanics. Next time your engineer friend says "close enough," just flash this look and watch them dissolve into practical insignificance.