Schrödinger's Grant Rejection

Physics majors don't just lift weights—they calculate angular momentum while doing it. The meme shows the natural habitat of physics students in the gym, visualizing dumbbells as rotating bodies with moment of inertia I x and angular velocity ω y . Why waste a perfectly good workout when you could be mentally solving rotational dynamics problems? Their bodies might be getting stronger, but their primary goal is clearly to impress their quantum mechanics professor.

When someone asks about pendulum period, physicists start with the simple formula T = 2π√(L/g). But when pushed about large angle oscillations? That's when the truth comes out - that horrifying infinite series expansion that makes students cry and calculators overheat! 😱 The simple formula only works for small angles (under ~5°), where sin(θ) ≈ θ. Beyond that, you need that monster equation with infinite summation to be mathematically honest. It's like ordering a "simple" coffee and getting handed a 17-ingredient frappuccino with extra calculus!

The fancy bear has spoken! Only materials scientists would get irrationally excited about the technically correct term "noninsulator" instead of just saying "conductor." It's that delicious pedantry that makes engineering parties wild. Next up: referring to water as "dihydrogen monoxide" while maintaining intense eye contact.

That tangled mess of wires is what happens when you let the "I know what I'm doing" guy take over. Kirchhoff's Law states that the sum of currents entering a junction equals the sum leaving it. Good luck figuring out where anything enters or leaves in this electrical nightmare! It's like asking someone to solve a differential equation while they're being electrocuted. The only thing being conserved here is pure chaos.

Engineers and scientists spending thousands of compute hours to simulate the fluid dynamics around a lobster that absolutely no one asked for is peak research energy. The colorful computational fluid dynamics visualization shows how air would flow around a lobster if it were... flying? Swimming through air? The absurdity lies in the hyper-specialized nature of this analysis—like someone defended a PhD thesis on "Crustacean Aeronautics" with a straight face. Next up: calculating the lift coefficient of a burrito.

The greatest inside joke in physics is that we really do only have these five jokes. I've been teaching for 30 years and still trot out the spherical cow when solving impossible problems. "Assume the cow is a perfect sphere in a vacuum..." It's practically a rite of passage. What's truly hilarious is watching new physics students discover these classics and thinking they're being original. Sorry kid, your Schrödinger's cat punchline was already old when Feynman was doodling in notebooks. The real sixth joke? The starting salary for physics graduates.