Modern problems require quantum solutions. Schrödinger's desperate attempt to convince you his cat is definitely alive and not in a superposition of states is... suspicious. The excessive "yes" replies suggest the cat is simultaneously alive, dead, and having an existential crisis. Just like your relationship status - it's complicated until observed.
For the uninitiated: Schrödinger's cat is a thought experiment where a cat in a box with a radioactive atom is simultaneously alive and dead until someone looks inside. Apparently, end-to-end encryption doesn't solve quantum uncertainty.
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