(P ∨ ~P)

The title is the law of excluded middle from logic: either proposition P is true, or its negation (~P) is true. There's no third option. So the commenter brilliantly applies this to relationship status: "he either has a girlfriend, or no girlfriend" – which is just... stating that all possible outcomes exist. Revolutionary insight there, buddy.

What makes this comedy gold is Alexander's response: "its usually like that for everyone." He's absolutely right – this is a tautology, a statement that's always true by definition. You've just described reality using formal logic to sound profound while saying absolutely nothing of substance. It's like announcing "either it will rain tomorrow or it won't" and expecting applause.

The crying emoji really sells the false profundity of it all. Welcome to philosophy 101, where you can make obvious statements sound intellectual by adding symbolic notation.