Goddamn Ancient Greeks Take The Credit For Everything!

Oh, Indiana! The mathematical rebel of the United States! This map shows that while the rest of the country celebrates Pi Day on March 14th (3/14, matching the first digits of π = 3.14...), Indiana stands alone in red, celebrating on March 20th. This is a brilliant reference to the infamous "Indiana Pi Bill" of 1897, when the Indiana state legislature nearly passed a bill that would have legally defined π as 3.2 instead of its actual value! A mathematician happened to be visiting and stopped this mathematical crime just in time. Imagine needing a different calculator just to cross state lines! "Sorry officer, I wasn't speeding in Indiana miles!"

The classic academic domino effect! What starts as innocent enthusiasm for biology quickly cascades into mathematical terror. First-year students swagger in thinking they'll dodge equations, only to discover that biology requires chemistry, chemistry is just applied physics, and physics is essentially math wearing a lab coat. It's the scientific equivalent of opening what you think is a cookie tin, but finding sewing supplies instead. The mathematical rake-to-the-face moment happens to even the brightest minds – you can run from equations, but you can't hide!

The coding trauma is REAL! This programmer just committed the cardinal sin of starting an array index at 1 instead of 0 in front of the wrong crowd. In programming, arrays traditionally start at index 0 (a convention most coders treat as sacred law), but MATLAB users start at 1. It's like announcing you put milk before cereal at a breakfast enthusiast convention. The MATLAB logo in the corner is the chef's kiss of this disaster - showing exactly which programming environment led to this social catastrophe. Now this poor soul is experiencing the social equivalent of a runtime error!

The existential horror of past-tense math facts! Nothing triggers mathematical anxiety quite like someone casually mentioning that a number "was" prime, as if primes could somehow lose their primality overnight. It's like saying "oxygen used to be an element" or "gravity was a fundamental force." Mathematical truths exist outside of time—they don't expire, go stale, or get voted out of office. Poor woman's reaction is every mathematician's internal scream when someone treats eternal truths as temporary visitors. Next thing you know, they'll be saying "Remember when π was approximately 3.14? Those were the days..."

Breaking math with a single equation! This student decided that infinity plus infinity equals 16, and honestly, that's the kind of confidence we should all aspire to. In the realm of mathematics, infinity (∞) is not even a number but a concept representing boundlessness—it's literally "too big to fail." Adding two infinities would still give you infinity, not a cute little 16. The teacher probably died inside a little watching years of mathematical education collapse in real time. It's like saying "the ocean plus another ocean equals this cup of water." Pure chaotic genius!

The expanding brain meme perfectly captures the mathematician's descent into madness. Starting with "direct proof" (basic skull), we progress through increasingly galaxy-brain methods until we reach the final boss: "proof by lack of counterexample" – which is basically saying "I can't think of why I'm wrong, so I must be right." Every math professor has witnessed the horror of a student writing "clearly" or "obviously" before the most convoluted statement imaginable. And don't get me started on "proof is left as an exercise to the reader" – the academic equivalent of "figure it out yourself, I'm going to lunch." It's what professors do when they either can't solve it themselves or are too lazy to write out all the steps. Pure mathematical terrorism.