Still Si[Ng]Le: Engineering Solutions To Dating Problems

The brutal truth of engineering life! Professors love saying "engineering is all about connections" while students are thinking "yeah... connections on LinkedIn to actually get a job!" 🔌⚡️ The double meaning hits hard - electrical connections, structural connections, network connections... but in the end, the REAL connections are who you know in the industry! Engineering students know the drill: spend 4 years learning Maxwell's equations only to end up crafting the perfect LinkedIn summary. The circuit of life is complete! ⚡

Behold, the pinnacle of American exceptionalism—where even our units of measurement scream freedom! 🦅 The left side shows the perfect rationality of the US system: Fahrenheit (where 0° is the coldest temperature recorded in Danzig in 1708, obviously), dates written as "July 4th 1776" (because freedom), and measurements that are all conveniently 100 (inches, feet, etc.). Meanwhile, the rest of the world wallows in the "chaos" of Celsius (based on silly things like water's freezing point), writes dates in a logical progression (day/month/year), and uses measurements based on powers of 10. Nothing says "scientific superiority" quite like refusing to adopt the International System of Units that literally every other country uses. Who needs standardization when you can have 5,280 feet in a mile? That's just good old American innovation!

The eternal workplace ecosystem: managers staring blankly into the void while engineers glare back with the intensity of someone who just found contamination in their carefully prepared cell culture. The silent battle between "we need this yesterday" and "that violates the laws of thermodynamics" plays out daily across labs and tech companies worldwide. The mutual incomprehension is so perfect it could be published in Nature as a new form of symbiotic relationship.

Engineering students can spot this one from a mile away! The Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapse of 1940 is basically the engineering equivalent of a campfire ghost story. No engineering professor can resist bringing it up, completely unprompted, as the ultimate cautionary tale of resonance gone wild. It's that perfect classroom moment where they lean in dramatically and say "and that's why you ALWAYS account for wind forces!" The bridge literally danced itself to death because someone forgot that bridges shouldn't wiggle like jello. Engineering professors treasure this disaster like it's a family heirloom they're legally obligated to pass down to every new generation of students.

Every engineer's existential crisis captured in one image. The Phillips head gets all the glory, the flathead was clearly designed by someone who hates humanity, and that square drive thinks it's special because it doesn't strip easily. Meanwhile, the hex key is the only one with its life together. But that fifth screw? We've all been there—staring at some bizarre proprietary fastener at 2 AM, wondering if we're having a stroke. And don't get me started on those last three... they're why repair manuals come with a "mental health warning." Nothing says "engineering hubris" quite like creating 37 different ways to connect two pieces of metal.

The perfect nuclear energy debate in miniature! Someone tries the classic NIMBY (Not In My Backyard) gotcha about nuclear waste disposal, but encounters a pro-nuclear enthusiast who flips the script with "You can with mine, nuclear is the way." What makes this extra spicy is how it highlights the stark divide between nuclear skeptics who focus on waste concerns versus advocates who see nuclear as a crucial clean energy solution. Fun fact: spent nuclear fuel is actually incredibly compact—all the waste ever generated by U.S. reactors would fit on a single football field stacked just 10 meters high! Meanwhile, the waste from your "clean" technologies? *gestures broadly at massive landfills full of solar panels and wind turbines that can't be recycled*