The First Lesson Every Undergraduate Gets When Learning About Quantum Physics

The ultimate physics bamboozle! This student's essay starts like a serious tribute to Niels Bohr but quickly descends into a magnificent rickroll. Hidden in the highlighted text is the immortal chorus of Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up"! Look closely at the first words of each line: "Never going to give you up, never gonna let you down..." Quantum mechanics meets 80s pop in this devious academic prank! The teacher probably expected discussions of electron orbits but got serenaded instead. Einstein may have said God doesn't play dice, but this student definitely plays tricks! *adjusts safety goggles while cackling maniacally*

Every physics student's nightmare: the dreaded train thought experiment! Einstein's special relativity is always introduced with "imagine you're inside a train moving at nearly the speed of light..." followed by increasingly mind-bending consequences that make your brain leak out your ears. The professor's hand hovers over that metaphorical button, ready to unleash another round of time dilation, length contraction, and relativistic mass increase that will have you questioning your existence. No wonder 9 out of 10 physics students develop an irrational fear of railway stations.

Sitting through thermodynamics lectures twice a week, nodding and smiling while the professor spouts equations about entropy, enthalpy, and Gibbs free energy. The cartoon character's "I like your funny words, magic man" perfectly captures that moment when you've completely lost track of why PV=nRT matters or why we're calculating the work done by an expanding gas for the fifth time this week. The first and second laws might as well be incantations from a spellbook. Heat flows, energy transforms, and somehow we're supposed to understand why a perpetual motion machine can't exist. Sure, professor. Whatever you say.

The real Final Fantasy! Those equations aren't gibberish—they're secretly spelling out "WUSSY" and "STUPID" using mathematical symbols! 🤓 Look closely at the first equation: φ = W Uγ + R U ρ + S U γ Uρ. And the second: W = - S Uγφ. Spot the pattern? Even that innocent-looking "n = π r²" is just there as mathematical camouflage! It's like Sephiroth is judging us with his piercing green eyes while hiding insults in plain sight. Physics textbooks could never!

Someone with a thermodynamics textbook and too much time on their hands has created the perfect phase diagram for gender identity. The supercooled "girltwinк" state is particularly brilliant—metastable until disturbed, then crystallizing into a "face-center cubic girl structure." I've stared at phase diagrams for 15 years and never once considered the "supercritical genderfluid" region or the "femboy triple point." My colleagues would absolutely publish this in the Journal of Irreproducible Results.

That photon is literally traveling at the speed of light with zero chill and zero mass. Imagine being so lightweight yet still managing to be the foundation of all electromagnetic radiation. Next time your friend acts important despite contributing nothing, just point at this meme. In physics, we call that "existing at the quantum level but flexing like you're macroscopic." Classic massless particle syndrome.