The Mathematician's Social Nightmare Starter Pack

The universal math confession starter pack! Nothing triggers social awkwardness faster than admitting you study math. Suddenly everyone's either confessing their trauma ("I was never good at math"), running away from algebra PTSD ("Once they started using letters AND numbers"), or expecting you to be their personal calculator ("Oh so you can calculate the tip?").

The best part? That note saying "Dear Math, I'm not a therapist. Solve your own problems." Pure gold! Mathematicians everywhere are nodding in silent agreement while simultaneously calculating the probability of escaping these conversations without someone asking what we're possibly going to do with our degree. Spoiler alert: that probability approaches zero faster than an exponential decay function!