Still No Graviton

The eternal curse of particle physics: spending billions on a fancy new collider only to get the same boring results. That sad thumbs-up cat is every physicist who secretly hoped to break physics and instead got... *checks notes*... perfect agreement with a 50-year-old theory. AGAIN. Funding committees be like: "So you want another $10 billion to confirm what we already know?" Meanwhile, string theorists are in the corner muttering "just wait until we can smash particles at Planck energy" for the 40th consecutive year.

The perfect crossover between Star Trek and electrical engineering doesn't exi-- That Fluke multimeter is set to measure ohms (Ω), which is the unit for electrical resistance. And there it is, displaying "FUTILE" instead of a number. Just like the Borg's famous catchphrase "resistance is futile," this multimeter has given up on measuring resistance altogether. Somewhere, a frustrated engineer is wondering if they've been assimilated into a collective of broken test equipment.

Someone's getting fired at the weight plate factory! This "10kg" plate weighs a measly 9.5kg according to that digital scale. The ISO 10012 standard at the bottom is the chef's kiss of irony - it's literally a measurement management system standard for ensuring measurement accuracy. Whoever QA'd this must have been skipping calibration day along with leg day. The EU investigation mentioned in the title? Totally warranted - DG GROW oversees industrial standards in the EU. Imagine building your entire workout routine on a lie. Those gains were never real!

The ultimate horseshoe theory of physics understanding! This bell curve meme perfectly captures how both intellectual extremes—flat earthers and relativistic physicists—somehow arrive at the same conclusion ("the ground is accelerating up") while the normies in the middle stick with "gravity pulls us down." What makes this brilliant is that Einstein's General Relativity actually does describe gravity not as a force but as the curvature of spacetime. Standing on Earth is equivalent to accelerating upward in empty space—it's called the equivalence principle! So the 145 IQ physicist is technically correct for profound reasons, while the 55 IQ flat earther stumbles into the same verbal description through sheer cosmic coincidence. Meanwhile, the 100 IQ normies with their "gravity pulls down" are technically wrong but functionally correct enough for everyday life.

The colonial empire strikes back...with superposition! This meme brilliantly captures how the British Empire might react upon discovering they could potentially exist in multiple colonies simultaneously. Quantum mechanics basically says "Why choose one country to invade when you could probabilistically occupy ALL countries at once?" That smug colonial smile says it all - Schrödinger's Empire is both collapsed AND expanding until observed by international courts! 🧐 Just imagine the tax benefits of having your tea particles entangled across multiple continents!

Einstein's office looking like a paper tsunami is the ULTIMATE scientific flex! 🧠 Why use fancy notation when you can just drown in your own genius? That blackboard full of equations and the desk buried under papers isn't messy—it's the physical manifestation of a mind too busy revolutionizing physics to organize paperwork! Turns out even the master of relativity couldn't relate to filing systems. His brain was too occupied figuring out how the universe works to worry about where he left yesterday's calculations. Genius and organization apparently exist in separate dimensions!