How To Unmake The Universe In One Wish

Walking past "Interest in Science" like she doesn't exist, but stopping dead in your tracks for "Math"? Classic academic betrayal! The irony is delicious - trying to separate math from science is like trying to separate peanut butter from a PB&J sandwich. Math isn't just a science, it's the language science speaks. Without math, physics is just philosophy with cooler explosions. Next thing you'll tell me is that you love water but hate H₂O!

The greatest cosmic hide-and-seek game ever! Dark matter is literally everywhere around us, making up most of our universe, yet completely invisible and undetectable by normal means. Scientists can only tell it exists because galaxies spin too fast without flying apart—like a merry-go-round spinning at 100mph while the horses stay attached by magic! The Tom face says it all: "I can explain gravitational lensing and cosmic microwave background radiation, but when you ask me to just POINT AT IT... well... *gestures vaguely at everything*"

Well, tell that to the woman about to discover firsthand that electricity is very observable when you're blow-drying your hair in the bathtub. Nothing like 120 volts of empirical evidence to disprove a textbook! Honestly, this "science" textbook reads like it was written by someone who thinks electrons are just a liberal conspiracy. "Some scientists think the sun may be the source of most electricity" — yeah, and some scientists think the earth is round, crazy stuff! After 40 years in physics, I can confirm we've actually figured out what electricity is. It's the flow of charged particles, not some mystical force that "seems to be everywhere." Though I suppose that's harder to explain than just throwing your hands up and saying "God's sparkly magic, who knows?"

Turns out smashing particles at near-light speeds requires strict behavioral guidelines. Who knew that the $10 billion machine designed to recreate conditions from the dawn of the universe would need a "no hanky-panky" sign? Perhaps CERN physicists were worried about introducing unexpected variables into their experiments. "Sorry, we discovered the God particle AND a baby." Clearly, some passions run hotter than the 5.5 trillion-degree plasma they're creating in there.

The professor isn't stupid—he's brilliant! The cartoon shows two people arguing over whether a number on the ground is a 6 or a 9, perfectly illustrating the concept of perspective and frame of reference. Neither person is wrong; they're just viewing the same reality from different positions. This is basically Einstein's relativity theory but with stick figures instead of trains! The beauty of using this in class is that it demonstrates how scientific disagreements often stem from different observational perspectives rather than someone being "wrong." Next time you're ready to call someone stupid for disagreeing, remember to check which side of the number you're standing on first!

The professional pi-fight we never knew we needed! Engineers round pi to 3 because who has time for decimal places when there's a bridge to build? Physicists hedge with "depends" because in some alternate universe, pi might actually be exactly 3 (looking at you, Indiana legislature of 1897). Meanwhile, mathematicians just scream "PI" and defenestrate themselves rather than suffer such numerical blasphemy. The mathematical constant π = 3.14159... deserves better than this approximation violence!