Probability Memes

Posts tagged with Probability

The Born Rule: Quantum Uncertainty In Action

The Born Rule: Quantum Uncertainty In Action
The movie poster parody that quantum physicists actually find exciting. Max Born's probability interpretation of quantum mechanics reimagined as an action thriller where the protagonist doesn't know his exact position AND momentum simultaneously. Critics say it's "fundamentally uncertain whether he'll make it to the sequel." The uncertainty principle has never looked so... determined.

A Ball *Might* Pass Through A Brick Wall

A Ball *Might* Pass Through A Brick Wall
That awkward moment when non-physicists expect you to revolutionize society with quantum tunneling, but you're just trying to calculate whether a subatomic particle has a 0.0000000001% chance of teleporting through a barrier. The quantum physics dream: "Yes, theoretically a baseball could quantum tunnel through a wall... if you wait longer than the heat death of the universe." Meanwhile, the public imagines teleportation devices by next Tuesday.

Both Wrong: The Statistical Truth About Deviance

Both Wrong: The Statistical Truth About Deviance
Everyone's got deviance all wrong! While women picture handcuffs (kinky or criminal?), and men imagine furry conventions (no judgment here!), statisticians are sitting in the corner like "ACTUALLY, it's a likelihood ratio test measuring how far observed data deviates from a null hypothesis." The mathematical formula at the bottom is statistical deviance in all its nerdy glory - twice the difference between log-likelihoods under different parameter estimates. Next time someone mentions "deviant behavior," just whip out this equation and watch their eyes glaze over faster than experimental data points on a scatterplot!

Society Is Rigged By Mathematics

Society Is Rigged By Mathematics
The dreaded 37% rule from optimal stopping theory strikes again! This is mathematical torture disguised as career advice. In decision theory, if you're selecting the best candidate from a pool (like dating or hiring), you should theoretically reject the first 37% of options to establish a baseline, then pick the next candidate that exceeds all previous ones. The facial expression perfectly captures that existential crisis moment when you realize you're part of the "exploration phase" - mathematically destined to be rejected regardless of qualifications. The probability gods have spoken, and they chose violence.

Quantum Mechanics Be Like

Quantum Mechanics Be Like
Welcome to the fundamental nature of reality, where nothing is certain until you measure it—and even then, it's questionable. This meme perfectly captures the existential crisis that is quantum mechanics. Particles existing in multiple states simultaneously? Electrons behaving like waves until you look at them? No wonder this guy looks concerned. Heisenberg wasn't just uncertain—he was downright confused. The universe basically runs on "maybe" and "probably" at the quantum level, making this the perfect face for anyone who's ever tried to pinpoint an electron's position and momentum simultaneously. Spoiler alert: you can't. The universe doesn't allow it. Just like my students don't allow me to finish lectures without asking impossible questions.

Shm My Head: When Probability Theory Dies Inside

Shm My Head: When Probability Theory Dies Inside
The statistical masterminds among us love to drop the profound "it's 50/50, it either happens or it doesn't" with the smuggest confidence imaginable. Of course, this completely butchers probability theory! Real statisticians and scientists are dying inside when someone reduces complex statistical distributions to a binary outcome. It's like saying there's a 50% chance you'll win the lottery because you either win or lose. The chess setup just completes the image of someone who thinks they're making 200 IQ moves while committing mathematical crimes against humanity!

Expected (Lack Of) Value

Expected (Lack Of) Value
Probability theory brutally crushing gambling dreams since forever! The meme shows gamblers justifying their habits with "you can only lose 100% but make 2000%" while mathematics says "No you don't." The formula at the bottom is Expected Value - E(X) - which calculates what you'll actually get on average by multiplying each outcome by its probability. For casinos, this formula always tilts in their favor (negative for players). So while gamblers dream of 2000% returns, the cold hard math says "the E(X) is coming" to collect its statistical dues. The house always wins... it's literally built into the equation!

Those Who Know Statistics

Those Who Know Statistics
The statistical tables have turned! This brilliant meme captures the duality of encountering statistical formulas. The left side shows the uninitiated—terrified by probability tables and normal distribution equations. Meanwhile, the right side reveals the enlightened statistician who sees the exact same formulas but with complete confidence. That Gaussian bell curve equation (the normal distribution formula) goes from nightmare fuel to a beautiful old friend depending entirely on your statistical literacy. It's basically the mathematical equivalent of meeting your in-laws for the first time versus your 10th family dinner together. The punchline? The formulas didn't change—your perspective did. Statistical enlightenment is just fear with better understanding and more confidence. And possibly a SpongeBob transformation.

Two Strategies To Guessing The Number Of Candies In A Jar

Two Strategies To Guessing The Number Of Candies In A Jar
Behold the duality of problem-solving! On the left, we have the mathematical mastermind calculating candy density, volume displacement, and probably the quantum probability of gumball distribution. Meanwhile, on the right... the chaotic genius who embraces statistical uncertainty with the sophisticated technique of "wild guessing." Both approaches have approximately the same success rate at county fairs! The true scientific method isn't always about complex formulas—sometimes it's about embracing your inner "idk maybe there's 60" energy and moving on with your life!

Roll A D∞: When Infinity Breaks Your Math

Roll A D∞: When Infinity Breaks Your Math
The mathematical madness is strong with this one! Our brave mathematician tried to calculate the expected value of rolling an infinity-sided die and ended up with the mind-bending result of "-0" (negative zero). That's like saying "I have less than no cookies" when your cookie jar is already empty! The horrified "Good lord in heaven" response is every mathematician's soul leaving their body when they spot a catastrophically wrong proof. It's the mathematical equivalent of dividing by zero and accidentally opening a portal to another dimension!

They Knew What They Did

They Knew What They Did
The grocery store display shows peppers arranged in a perfect bell-shaped curve (red, yellow, green) - a statistical distribution that haunts every science student's nightmares! The produce manager clearly has a background in statistics and decided to torment shoppers with this visual representation of normal distribution. The yellow peppers form the peak frequency while red and green taper off symmetrically on each side. Next-level nerdy grocery arrangement that probably made math professors giggle uncontrollably in the produce aisle.

Spotify Shuffling Would Arguably Be Better Random Than Whatever It Currently Is

Spotify Shuffling Would Arguably Be Better Random Than Whatever It Currently Is
The eternal battle between intuition and actual statistics! The top panel shows someone worried that true randomness would play some songs too much while ignoring others. But PLOT TWIST! That's exactly what real randomness does! 🧪 In genuine random sampling, clusters and gaps are not just possible—they're expected ! It's like flipping a coin 10 times and getting 7 heads. Seems fishy, but mathematically normal! What humans perceive as "random" is actually more evenly distributed than true randomness. That's why Spotify's "random" isn't random at all—it's engineered to feel random to our pattern-seeking brains. Statistics: making our intuition look silly since forever!