Linear Algebra Gives Me PTSD

Behold Plato's allegory of STEM majors! Math folks are strolling blissfully in the sunshine, completely oblivious to reality. Physics majors are halfway down the cave, still clinging to theoretical elegance while occasionally glancing at actual problems. Meanwhile, engineers are deep in the trenches, building torches and solving real-world disasters with duct tape and differential equations. The hierarchy is perfect—mathematicians create problems, physicists describe them, and engineers fix them. It's the academic food chain in its natural habitat!

The eternal struggle of math students everywhere! That moment when you're asked to simplify √7 and you confidently write "7" only to discover that—surprise!—irrational numbers don't magically become integers just because you want them to. The wall behind the character perfectly represents what happens to your brain when you realize √7 ≈ 2.646 and can't be simplified further. Pure mathematical trauma in anime form! Pro tip: If you're ever unsure whether a square root can be simplified, check if the number under the radical is a perfect square. Spoiler alert: 7 isn't one. Your math teacher's red pen thanks you for your contribution to their ink usage.

Behold the superior search engine for the intellectually elite! This reimagined Google logo transforms the ordinary "oogle" into the mathematical expression "5²gle" (5-squared-gle). For those whose brains operate on a higher frequency, this would be pronounced "twenty-five-gle" since 5² = 25. Finally, a search engine that weeds out anyone who can't handle basic exponents! Next update: replacing the search button with an integral that must be solved before your results appear.

The dependency on calculators has reduced our basic arithmetic skills to that of a primitive cave dweller. The answer is 2.57142857143, but who has time to divide by hand when we're busy solving climate change and developing AI that will eventually make us all obsolete? The real math problem is calculating how much dignity we lose every time we check if 5+3=8.

Starting the matrix algebra indoctrination before they can even focus their eyes! While most parents are showing their newborns lullaby videos, this mathematical mastermind is programming their child with Gaussian Elimination—the method for solving systems of linear equations by transforming them into row echelon form. Nothing says "I want you to become an engineer" quite like substituting Sesame Street with linear algebra. The baby might not understand it now, but in 18 years they'll thank their parent when they're breezing through differential equations while their classmates are having existential crises!

The ultimate showdown between modern math students and Al-Khwarizmi, the 9th century Persian mathematician who basically invented algebra! That accusatory stare perfectly captures the collective trauma of generations who've had to solve for x. While ancient mathematicians were perfectly content with numerical calculations, this mathematical mastermind just had to introduce variables and equations that haunt homework assignments to this day. Thanks to him, we've all experienced that existential crisis when letters suddenly invade what was supposed to be a numbers-only party. The irony? His name literally gave us the word "algorithm" - so he's responsible for both our calculator apps AND the reason we need them!