There's No Such Thing As Lithium

This meme cuts deeper than a precision scalpel. Thalidomide, the notorious pharmaceutical from the 1950s, had two mirror-image forms (enantiomers) due to chirality. One form was a helpful sedative, the other caused severe birth defects. The drug's molecular structure literally said "I am aware of the effect I have on women" in the most tragic way possible. Chemistry's darkest "hold my beer" moment that revolutionized drug safety testing forever.

Organic chemists have a one-track mind. See a carbon atom? Must be organic chemistry. Never mind that carbon is literally everywhere—in your pencil, your soda, that diamond ring you can't afford on a researcher's salary. To an orgo chemist, spotting carbon is like finding free food in the department lounge—suddenly everything else ceases to exist. The rest of us just roll our eyes while they frantically draw hexagons on every available surface.

The expectation vs. reality of organic chemistry is painfully accurate here. The top shows a stick figure happily drawing cute molecular structures with smiley faces, thinking it's all about fun shapes and "happiness!!" The bottom reveals the brutal truth - you're getting wrecked by R/S configurations, dealing with projections that might as well be furniture being thrown at you, and isomers that are cranking up the difficulty to 11. That "Nu:-)" notation is particularly clever - it's both a smiley face and a nucleophile notation, right before it all comes crashing down. Every chemistry student starts with dreams of drawing pretty hexagons and ends up in the fetal position questioning their life choices!

Behold, the "breakthrough" drug that looks like someone let a toddler loose with the periodic table. This monstrosity contains everything from gold to xenon because apparently cancer cells will be too confused to replicate when hit with this chemical chaos. Side effects include: your pharmacist having an existential crisis, your insurance company laughing hysterically at your claim, and the possibility that it might actually turn you into a superhero. Pharma companies be like: "This will cost $50,000 per dose and we named it Complexiva™."

Chemistry students know the pain! The three states of matter (solid, liquid, gas) are granted seats on the chemistry council, but aqueous solutions—essentially solutes dissolved in water—are treated like the Anakin Skywalker of phase states. Technically present in discussions but never given full recognition as a distinct phase. The perfect crystallization of scientific gatekeeping! Water might dissolve almost anything, but apparently it can't dissolve the rigid hierarchy of traditional phase classifications.

Ah, the classic scientific nationalism dilemma featuring Louis Pasteur and Robert Koch - the original lab rivalry before Twitter arguments existed. Left side shows Pasteur with his "science is global except during war" stance, while Koch on the right is all "knowledge transcends borders." Essentially the 19th century version of "should I share my research methods in the publication or keep that secret sauce to myself?" Scientists still haven't figured this one out 150 years later. The eternal struggle between patriotic duty and scientific brotherhood continues in grant applications everywhere.