That Unit Is Literally Astronomical

The mathematical heartbreak is real! This genius calculated the gravitational force between himself (60kg) and his crush (78kg) at 2m distance, yielding 7.80×10 -8 Newtons. Meanwhile, the Moon's pull on her is 1.97×10 -3 Newtons—roughly 25,000 times stronger! Newton's law of gravitation proving once again that the universe has zero respect for your dating life. The LaTeX formatting really sells the desperation of comparing yourself to a 7.35×10 22 kg celestial body. Pro tip: maybe try reducing the distance variable instead of crying about astronomical competition?

Scientists spend their entire careers trying to figure out why reality exists in the first place! That suspicious Spider-Man face perfectly captures the scientific community's collective reaction to the universe's existence. Like, seriously universe? You're just gonna... exist? With all your weird quantum physics, dark matter, and inexplicable constants? And then expect us to make sense of you? The audacity! Scientists have been squinting suspiciously at reality for centuries, desperately trying to reverse-engineer the cosmic code while muttering "what in the goddamn..." under their breath.

That moment when cosmology breaks your brain. The universe has physical constants so perfectly fine-tuned that if they were off by even a billionth of a percent, we wouldn't exist. Yet here we are, contemplating our own existence while lying on wooden floors. Either we hit the cosmic lottery jackpot, or there's an infinite number of universes where Nobita's doppelgängers are asking the same question with slightly different physical laws. The anthropic principle basically says "we're here because we're here" which is the scientific equivalent of answering "because I said so."

The true nightmare for astronomers isn't supernatural monsters—it's consecutive nights of cloud cover! This brilliant parody of the horror game "Five Nights at Freddy's" captures the existential dread of planning a telescope observation only to face the ultimate villain: weather. Nothing strikes fear into an astronomer's heart quite like checking the forecast and seeing five straight nights of clouds when you've booked precious telescope time. That faint static noise? That's just the sound of research grants evaporating into the atmosphere along with your dreams of data collection.

The ultimate conversation killers across different domains! While most people get touchy about salary or age questions, astrophysicists literally cannot stop themselves from launching into existential gravity theories at the slightest provocation. One minute you're at a dinner party making small talk, the next you're trapped in a 45-minute lecture about dark energy and the curvature of spacetime. The true universal constant isn't gravity—it's an astrophysicist's enthusiasm for questioning everything we think we know about the cosmos!

The red line showing the eclipse path completely misses Alaska! Geography and astronomy collide in this cosmic joke. While the continental US was busy posting eclipse selfies and diamond ring effects, Alaskans were just having another regular day of... well, Alaska stuff. They weren't ignoring the eclipse - they literally couldn't see it! It's like waiting for a party that's happening in another state. Next time someone asks why Alaskans weren't posting eclipse content, just point to this map and say "That's not how orbits work, Susan."