Maybe I Really Am A Superhuman

The scientific productivity flowchart nobody warns you about. With optimal conditions (coffee + internet + good salary), you're cranking out products in a week. Remove coffee? Your timeline stretches to a month and quality melts like ice cream in a hot lab. Lose internet access? You're buried in reference books while the infinity symbol replaces your deadline. And when management cuts your salary? Congratulations, you've unlocked the special "one year" timeline featuring the rare bug ecosystem that spontaneously evolves around your code. The second law of thermodynamics applies to coding projects too—entropy always increases, especially when resources decrease.

The career crossroads for math majors: become a domestic terrorist by proving P=NP or join the CIA to crack encryption algorithms. That moment when you realize your ability to solve differential equations has made you both a national security asset and potential threat. The duality of being able to understand complex math—you're either building castles or storming them.

Gaming nerds 🤝 Theoretical physicists: Optimizing performance at all costs. The meme brilliantly combines the absurd "glasses = smart" stereotype with computer gaming logic. Claiming smart people have poor eyesight because they're running their brains at higher processing speeds is hilariously wrong yet weirdly satisfying as a theory. Then comes the savage punchline about Stephen Hawking "closing background tasks for more fps" - a dark but genius joke about how his brilliant mind operated despite his physical limitations. It's the perfect collision of gamer culture and science humor that's simultaneously terrible and brilliant.

Engineers aren't just problem-solvers—they're caffeine-powered sarcasm generators! The flowchart nails the engineering lifecycle with brutal honesty: feed an engineer problems and coffee, and out comes solutions... with a complimentary side dish of sarcasm that nobody ordered. The "side effect" label is particularly brilliant because, like any good engineering documentation, it acknowledges the unintended outputs that management pretends don't exist. Every engineer knows that caffeine-to-code conversion rate is directly proportional to the amount of deadpan commentary produced along the way.

The engineering evolution nobody warns you about! Fresh grads show up with their adorable collection of precision tools, ready to measure everything down to the atomic level. Fast forward a few years, and suddenly you're eyeballing measurements with a beer bottle while muttering "close enough" under your breath. Precision tools? Who needs 'em when you've got the sacred knowledge that being off by 0.06 degrees won't cause the building to collapse... probably. The true mark of engineering expertise isn't how many tools you have—it's knowing exactly how much you can get away with before physics notices and takes revenge.

The classic programmer's journey! Instead of returning 35 (7×5), this calculator outputs "Hello World" – the universal first line of code every developer writes. It's that magical moment when your brain says "do math" but your coding instincts scream "PRINT SOMETHING!" The perfect representation of how even the simplest programming projects inevitably veer off into unexpected territory. Every CS student just felt this in their soul.