Traffic Memes

The title isn't lying! Wearing black while cycling is basically nature's way of saying "I choose death today." The physics of light reflection shows why that green cyclist can be spotted from a small country away (426 ft!), while the black one might as well be wearing an invisibility cloak. This is why cyclists in neon colors look ridiculous but live to tell about it. Evolution clearly didn't prepare us for roads - natural selection now happens via visibility charts instead of genetic fitness. The red cyclist at 79 ft is that perfect middle ground where drivers can see you just in time to feel really bad about what's about to happen. Pro tip: If you're choosing between fashion and being seen by two-ton metal death machines, maybe reconsider your priorities. The white cyclist at 180 ft is just showing off their practical compromise between "wanting to live" and "not looking like a human highlighter."

Einstein would be PROUD of this speeding ticket defense! When the driver says "speed is relative," they're invoking Einstein's theory of relativity where measurements like speed depend on the observer's frame of reference. From the driver's perspective, they were perfectly stationary while the world zoomed past them! The cop's radar gun is merely measuring relative motion between two reference frames! *adjusts wild scientist hair* Of course, this brilliant physics defense probably won't hold up in traffic court... unless the judge happens to be a quantum physicist moonlighting in the judicial system. The universal speed limit is still 299,792,458 m/s (speed of light), so technically they weren't even CLOSE to breaking the cosmic law!