Tier list Memes

Someone's been licking the periodic table again. Apparently polonium has that distinctive "tastes like cancer" bouquet, while alkali metals go "kaboom" on the tongue. The noble gases? "Delightful" aroma, naturally. This is what happens when chemists work through lunch. For the record, calcium and gold being categorized as "yummy" explains why your expensive supplements and fancy desserts both leave that metallic aftertaste. And those synthetic elements at the bottom? They don't count because they're man-made, but they'd give you cancer anyway. Science is just spicy cooking with extra steps.

The only tier list that comes with a side of radiation poisoning and a hospital stay. Top tier has all the radioactive elements because apparently cancer has a distinctive flavor profile. Meanwhile, calcium and gold are "yummy" - which explains why medieval alchemists kept trying to eat their experiments. The alkali metals are labeled "kaboom" because nothing says delicious like a violent reaction with your saliva. And let's appreciate the honesty of "I don't feel so good" tier - mercury and lead are indeed mood killers. Pro tip: if you're wondering whether something from the periodic table is edible, the answer is almost always "please don't." This is basically the chemistry version of those "forbidden snack" memes, except following this guide would actually end your subscription to living.

Only a chemistry nerd would rank their beverages by molecular structure! This "unbiased" drinks tier list is actually ranking compounds like dichloromethane and tetrahydrofuran in the S-tier, while relegating plain water (H-O-H) to F-tier. Basically, some mad scientist is claiming that drinking chlorinated solvents is superior to hydration. Sure, dichloromethane might dissolve your lab gloves impressively fast, but it'll also dissolve your liver even faster! The creator's "unbiased" opinion is clearly just organic chemistry propaganda. Next time someone offers you a drink from their "S-tier" collection, maybe ask for a chemistry safety data sheet first.