New Mathematical Slang Alert

The existential horror of past-tense math facts! Nothing triggers mathematical anxiety quite like someone casually mentioning that a number "was" prime, as if primes could somehow lose their primality overnight. It's like saying "oxygen used to be an element" or "gravity was a fundamental force." Mathematical truths exist outside of time—they don't expire, go stale, or get voted out of office. Poor woman's reaction is every mathematician's internal scream when someone treats eternal truths as temporary visitors. Next thing you know, they'll be saying "Remember when π was approximately 3.14? Those were the days..."

Newton judging your Instagram scrolling from beyond the grave is peak historical fiction! The irony here is magnificent - Newton invented calculus but died about 270 years before social media existed. Differential equations weren't even formalized until Leibniz and others developed the field further. That disapproving powdered wig energy though? Absolutely timeless. Next time you're doom-scrolling, imagine Newton whispering "For every action of opening TikTok, there is an equal and opposite reaction of your math homework remaining unsolved." The guilt is practically a force of nature!

The perfect encapsulation of math conference dynamics! When presented with the simple sequence 1,2,3,4,5,6 and asked "What's next?", we get two distinct mathematician species in their natural habitat: The overwrought theorist: "No! This question makes no sense! I can create a polynom saying its 42 069!" - complete with tears of mathematical frustration. Meanwhile, the normal humans on either end of the bell curve simply answer "7" and move on with their lives. The distribution perfectly captures how mathematicians love to overcomplicate what should be straightforward problems. The best part? The IQ distribution suggesting the most brilliant minds and the most basic thinkers arrive at the same conclusion, while the "average geniuses" in the middle are busy having existential crises over number sequences. Pure mathematical sociology!

The eternal physics unit system showdown! On the left, we have the absolute CHAD of theoretical physics - the CGS system (centimeter-gram-second) with its muscular simplicity. No pesky constants cluttering your Maxwell equations! All electromagnetic fields with matching dimensions! Pure elegance! Meanwhile, the wimpy SI system (right) is just trying to survive practical calculations while constantly converting units and wondering what the heck a statcoulomb is. The struggle is REAL for engineering students everywhere who just want resistance measured in good ol' Ohms without needing a conversion table tattooed on their forearm. Physicists secretly fighting about unit systems is the nerdiest flex ever - and I'm totally here for it! 🤓⚡

Ever had that nightmare where you're back in elementary school and suddenly need to recite the multiplication table of 579? No? Just me then. This is the mathematical equivalent of being asked to bench press a car after only training with 5-pound dumbbells. Sure, we all memorized our times tables, but whoever decided 579 should be on the curriculum was clearly a sadist with a calculator. The best part? Those cheerful cartoon children looking so excited about it. Yeah, because nothing says childhood joy like calculating 579 × 17 without a calculator. That's not education—that's psychological warfare with numbers.

The mathematical equivalent of saying "I breathed oxygen today." Euler developed like 57 different methods across calculus, differential equations, and number theory. Saying you used "Euler's method" to a mathematician is like telling a chef you "used heat" to cook. The friend's glowing skeleton face perfectly captures that moment when someone realizes they're dealing with a mathematical poser who's about to get absolutely destroyed in the next homework assignment.