A Bit Mean? More Like A Bit Terrifying!

Nothing triggers mathematical PTSD quite like these abominations. Let's break down this parade of horrors: • That natural log with the subscript e is redundant torture - it's like saying "ATM machine" but for people who actually passed calculus • The square root of 2 with that tiny 2 on top? Pure sadism. Is it the square root or not? Make up your mind! • Sin⁻¹(x) looking like a reciprocal when it's actually the inverse function. Thirty years teaching and I still have to remind students it's not 1/sin(x) • And that x² = x×x monstrosity... I've failed students for less. Probably why my course evaluations are terrible. No wonder mathematicians drink.

Engineering departments bursting at the seams while pure mathematics sits empty? Yep, that's modern education in a nutshell! Everyone's scrambling for those "practical" degrees that promise employment, while abstract mathematical theory collects dust. The irony? Those engineering formulas they're studying were developed by the mathematicians they're avoiding. It's like everyone wants to drive the car but nobody wants to know how the engine works!

Nothing says "foreplay" like discussing abstract mathematical concepts in bed. The true sapiosexual's guide to romance: skip the poetry and whisper sweet nothings about elliptic curves and tensor calculus. The only thing getting "packed" tonight is those n-spheres. Let's be honest - in the hierarchy of turn-ons, Ramanujan's biography ranks somewhere between differential equations and triangulated categories. Math nerds take note: this approach works exactly 0% of the time, every time.

Dating a mathematician is all about managing expectations. Sure, I said I have a "plane," but I never specified which coordinate system we were operating in! Those fancy jets cost millions, but my beautiful 2D geometric plane? Priceless. And technically more mathematically perfect than any physical aircraft could ever be. Next time someone asks if you fly private, just whip out your graph paper and say "I prefer to keep my planes in Cartesian space—the turbulence is much more predictable."

The eternal struggle of math students everywhere! Someone innocently asks how to type equations, and the response is just... Microsoft Word? The silent horror on her face says it all. Anyone who's tried wrestling with Word's equation editor knows that pain. It's like trying to perform surgery with oven mitts. Meanwhile, LaTeX users are watching this conversation and quietly judging from a distance. The real joke is that proper mathematicians would rather write equations by hand on napkins than subject themselves to Word's equation torture chamber.

Turns out the path to mathematical enlightenment is paved with Pepto-Bismol. That perfect correlation between math degrees and tummy aches isn't just statistical noise—it's the universe's way of telling you that discovering the secrets of prime numbers requires intestinal fortitude in the most literal sense. The more theorems you prove, the more your digestive system protests. I've seen PhD candidates survive on nothing but chalk dust and antacids for weeks. Remember kids, correlation doesn't imply causation... but in this case, I'm pretty sure differential equations are directly responsible for acid reflux.