BEHOLD! The Standard Model of Elementary Particles has been gloriously relabeled! Instead of boring old "force carriers," we now have "mental illnesses"! 🤣
This is what happens when physicists get bored waiting for their particle accelerator time. The bottom quark is now just ":3" because why describe fundamental reality with words when you can use emoticons?! And those gauge bosons? CLEARLY they're "vector mental illnesses" now!
Next week in physics: we'll rename quantum chromodynamics to "spicy particle vibes" and dark matter to "the universe's emotional baggage." SCIENCE!