The Crocodile Always Eats The Bigger Number

Terminal commands for cosmic catastrophe. Just your average astrophysicist trying to peek inside a black hole using a cat as the observer. Schrödinger would be proud, though the cat looks understandably concerned about being volunteered for this particular experiment. Nothing like risking complete spaghettification to satisfy scientific curiosity.

Trillions of atoms in the universe, and yet when physicists finally peek inside one, they find... a single electron. That's the cosmic equivalent of driving across the country to visit a museum only to find it's just a guy named Steve showing off his bottle cap collection. The existential disappointment is palpable. Quantum physics: where the building blocks of reality are simultaneously everywhere and nowhere, but mostly just underwhelming.

Nobody says "light" at fancy physics conferences. It's always "electromagnetic radiation" with a monocle and bow tie. Same photons, different tax bracket. The scientific equivalent of saying "tomato" vs "solanum lycopersicum" to impress your date. Next time your professor corrects you, just remind them both travel at exactly 299,792,458 m/s – whether dressed for prom or a pajama party.

The table claims studying Classical Electrodynamics costs just $0.12/hour because the textbook lasts 1,000 hours. That's like saying banging your head against Maxwell's equations is "entertainment." Sure, and lab explosions are "planned demonstrations." The real cost should include therapy sessions and the coffee required to comprehend why a moving charge creates a magnetic field at 3 AM. Whoever made this clearly never had to derive the wave equation in spherical coordinates while questioning their life choices.

That moment when you think you've outsmarted thermodynamics with your "gotcha" question! The teacher's explaining how no electrical device can be 100% efficient because some energy always converts to heat. Then comes the student with what they think is a brilliant loophole: "What about a heater?" The teacher's face says it all. Yes, technically a heater's purpose IS to produce heat, but that doesn't make it 100% efficient - there's still energy lost through light, sound, and heat that escapes where it's not intended. The second law of thermodynamics remains undefeated, and so does the teacher's patience.

First day in quantum physics and the uranium atom starts speaking in biblical angel format. Those 92 electrons aren't just orbiting—they're witnessing your sins. The Bohr model wasn't supposed to have consciousness, yet here we are, staring into the atomic abyss while it stares back with its many electron "eyes." No wonder the guy's terrified. Nothing in grad school prepares you for an atom that judges your research methods and whispers "fear not" before irradiating your lab notebook.