Internet Culture Collides With The Standard Model

Science without numbers? Might as well call it philosophy and be done with it. This is like advertising "Swimming Without Water" or "Astronomy Without Looking Up." Nominalism is that philosophical stance where someone insists mathematical objects don't actually exist—they're just convenient fictions. Sure, and gravity is just a suggestion. Next thing you know, we'll have "Chemistry Without Elements" and "Biology Without Cells." The quantitative rebellion is here, folks, and it's as useful as a chocolate teapot in a sauna.

The physics humor is strong with this one! This meme brilliantly parodies how black holes consume everything in their path—including light itself—by showing someone aggressively slurping up an egg yolk. The "Hawking radiation" panel is the chef's kiss of astrophysics jokes. While black holes devour anything that crosses their event horizon, Stephen Hawking theorized they actually emit tiny amounts of radiation due to quantum effects near their boundaries. So technically, black holes aren't just cosmic vacuum cleaners; they're also very subtle cosmic leakers. The egg yolk perfectly represents matter getting absolutely demolished by gravitational forces that not even light can escape from. Cosmic destruction has never looked so... breakfast-y.

Nothing ages you quite like breaking the entire classical model of physics! Poor Max Planck started as a dapper young gentleman, transformed into a wild-haired mad scientist during his quantum revelation, and ended up looking like he'd seen the universe's deepest secrets (and wished he hadn't). Planck literally invented quantum theory to solve the "ultraviolet catastrophe" problem, thinking it was just a mathematical trick. Then Einstein came along and said "Nope, light actually IS quantized!" and Planck was like "Wait, what have I done?!" His hair never recovered from the shock.

The physics here is absolutely magnificent ! A shrunken moon would still maintain its original mass (conservation of mass, folks!) but with drastically reduced volume. This creates an object with density comparable to a neutron star! Throwing this ultra-dense mini-moon would create an impact equivalent to millions of nuclear bombs. The atmospheric entry? That's where it gets spicy! The mini-moon would generate so much friction it would create a plasma sheath hot enough to ionize air molecules. But unlike typical meteors, its extreme density means it wouldn't lose much mass during entry. Earth would essentially get punched by a cosmic bowling ball with the mass of our actual moon. So would it burn up? Not even close. We'd be looking at an extinction-level event that makes dinosaurs feel lucky. Gru's villainous plan is basically "advanced planetary destruction with extra steps."

The eternal physics debate depicted as an IQ bell curve—where both the simpletons and geniuses agree "physics is about equations," while the pseudo-intellectuals in the middle desperately cry "physics is a way of understanding, equations distract from concepts!" Every physics department has these three types: the undergrads who memorize formulas without understanding them, the insufferable grad students who think they're too enlightened for math, and the battle-scarred professors who've come full circle to appreciate that, yes, the universe speaks in equations after all. The horseshoe theory of physics education in action. The real joke? We all end up using calculators anyway.

Physics students solving for the tension in the string connecting multiple cows? Trivial. But determining which cow to choose when the problem just says "select point C"? That's where the real challenge begins. Graduate students still wake up in cold sweats remembering these ambiguous instructions. The correct answer is always the one you didn't pick.