Veganism Memes

Posts tagged with Veganism

Kingdom Confusion: The Fungi Identity Crisis

Kingdom Confusion: The Fungi Identity Crisis
The taxonomic rebellion hiding in your vegan diet! Mushrooms belong to Kingdom Fungi, not Plantae—they're closer to animals than plants on the evolutionary tree. They lack chlorophyll, cell walls made of cellulose, and can't photosynthesize. Instead, they digest food externally by secreting enzymes and absorbing nutrients, much like we do internally. Next time a vegan friend claims "I only eat plants," hit them with this mycological mic drop and watch their existential crisis unfold in real-time.

What The Quarks Don't Want You To Know

What The Quarks Don't Want You To Know
Turns out we're all just consuming the Standard Model of Elementary Particles in different packaging. Vegans think they're avoiding animal products, but quarks don't care if they're arranged in a plant-based patty or ground beef. At the subatomic level, your ethical choices are fundamentally meaningless. Nothing like a bit of particle physics to ruin your moral superiority at dinner parties.

Charles Darwin: Taxonomist By Day, Taste-onomist By Night

Charles Darwin: Taxonomist By Day, Taste-onomist By Night
Darwin's duality perfectly captured! The father of natural selection had two reactions to new species: scientific excitement AND culinary curiosity. While documenting biodiversity on the Beagle voyage, Darwin was notorious for his "eat what you study" approach—famously sampling giant tortoises, iguanas, and exotic birds. His Galapagos field notes often included tasting notes alongside taxonomic details! The ultimate taxonomic foodie would absolutely demolish an all-you-can-eat exotic buffet before carefully preserving the bones for scientific posterity. Vegetarians beware: your evolutionary hero was basically running a traveling restaurant of endangered species.