Satellites Memes

The statistical distribution of people who think the Moon is a planet is both hilarious and terrifying. Nothing makes an astronomer's eye twitch faster than hearing "the Moon is a planet." It's like calling a bicycle a car because they both have wheels. For the record: our Moon orbits Earth, not the Sun directly. It's a natural satellite, not a planet. Yet somehow this basic astronomical fact seems to exist in a quantum superposition in the public consciousness. Poor Anton Petrov (science YouTuber extraordinaire) probably needs therapy after reading his comment section. The bell curve of intelligence strikes again, with the extremes on both sides confidently wrong. And here we are, in the middle, crying into our astronomy textbooks.

The cosmic joke's on us! While Jupiter parades around with Europa, Ganymede, and Callisto, and Saturn shows off Titan and Enceladus, Earth's just sitting here with... "Moon." That's it. Just "Moon." It's like naming your pet "Dog" or your child "Human." The astronomical equivalent of ordering vanilla ice cream at a 31-flavor shop. Somewhere in the universe, alien astronomers are probably making fun of our profound lack of creativity.