Fieldwork Memes

Posts tagged with Fieldwork

Knowledge Is Venomous, Actually

Knowledge Is Venomous, Actually
Remember that crucial distinction between poisonous (toxic when you eat it) and venomous (toxic when it injects you)? The Oklahoma Wildlife Department certainly does! The poor stranger learned this taxonomic technicality the hard way—through empirical testing with rather severe physiological consequences. Nothing teaches biological classification quite like anaphylactic shock. Next time, maybe consult a field guide instead of conducting a first-person experiment?

Field Biologist Problems

Field Biologist Problems
The stark contrast between lab scientists who analyze samples versus the field researchers who collect them is painfully accurate. Top: pristine lab coats, clean hair, glasses that haven't been rained on. Bottom: sleep-deprived wilderness goblins who've been bitten by three unidentified insects, fallen into a bog, and haven't seen proper plumbing in weeks. Both are essential to science, but only one group remembers what shampoo feels like. Field work transforms you into something feral—and we're all secretly proud of it.

Snake Taxonomy: The Field Guide Vs. Reality

Snake Taxonomy: The Field Guide Vs. Reality
The meme presents a seemingly helpful herpetological identification guide, suggesting you examine a snake's anal plate scales to determine if it's venomous. Then comes the punchline from someone with actual survival instincts. Field biologists have this ongoing joke about the disconnect between academic knowledge and practical application. Sure, I could tell you about subcaudal scale patterns while being injected with hemotoxins, or I could use my highly evolved bipedal locomotion to exit the situation. The irony is that this identification method is somewhat legitimate, though I'd recommend binoculars rather than a close examination of reptilian posteriors. My dissertation didn't prepare me for snake butt analysis in the wild.

Can You Lick The Science?

Can You Lick The Science?
Ever wondered if you could taste science? This hilarious guide breaks down which scientific disciplines you should (or definitely should NOT) lick! Chemistry's emphatic "NO!!!!!" is spot on because, well, acids and bases aren't exactly tongue-friendly. Herpetology's "bad plan BAD PLAN" had me crying—imagine licking a venomous snake for science! 😂 The zoology entry flips the script brilliantly: "In zoology, science licks YOU." Meanwhile, epidemiology's desperate plea "FOR THE SAKE OF THE WORLD PLEASE DO NOT" feels especially relevant after recent years! Computer scientists apparently debug with their tongues—who knew that's what the 9V battery test was really training us for? My favorite might be geology's honest assessment: "Sometimes needed. Sometimes dangerous." Rock identification does occasionally involve the tongue test (for certain minerals), but licking uranium? Hard pass!

The Glamorous Vs. Hazardous Side Of Scientific Discovery

The Glamorous Vs. Hazardous Side Of Scientific Discovery
The scientific divide is real! Physics and chemistry discoveries get you a fancy trophy and a glamour shot, while biology discoveries have you suited up like you're handling the zombie apocalypse. Nothing says "I made a breakthrough" quite like full hazmat gear and the lingering question of whether that new species you found might actually kill you. Physicists discover a new particle and get champagne. Biologists discover a new fungus and get antibiotics... just in case.

A Day In The Life Of A Civil Engineer

A Day In The Life Of A Civil Engineer
Five guys staring intensely at a blueprint that's basically just a square with a triangle on top. This is peak civil engineering - spending hours debating if that line should be 2mm to the left while standing in literal dirt. The blueprint says "house" without saying "house." Meanwhile, the client probably wants a swimming pool, home theater, and helicopter pad added "for just a small additional fee."