Collider Memes

Posts tagged with Collider

The Political Particle Accelerator

The Political Particle Accelerator
The Large Hadron Collider of politics! Instead of smashing subatomic particles together to discover the fundamental forces of nature, political scientists accelerate opposing ideologies to their breaking point and watch the spectacular explosion of talking points and finger-pointing that follows. The real quantum entanglement happens when both sides somehow manage to be simultaneously right and wrong depending on who's observing. The only difference? CERN gets Nobel Prizes while political scientists get angry emails from both sides.

Particle Physicists: The Ultimate Commitment-Phobes

Particle Physicists: The Ultimate Commitment-Phobes
Ever notice how particle physics is basically just cosmic ghostbusting? These massive circular colliders are like $10 billion breakup rings where physicists smash atoms together and then immediately ghost the experiment before figuring out what actually happened! 🤣 The Large Hadron Collider is 27km in circumference, and they're already planning bigger ones reaching 100km! Why? Because apparently the first 99 failed attempts at understanding the universe weren't humbling enough! It's like dating - just one more collision and SURELY we'll find that perfect Higgs boson to settle down with!

Gone In A Zeptosecond

Gone In A Zeptosecond
Spending 20 years and $10 billion to discover a particle that exists for 0.0000000000000000000001 seconds is the physics equivalent of a one-night stand. "I swear it was here! I measured it! We had a connection!" Sure, buddy. At least you got a paper out of it. That's the emotional rollercoaster of particle physics—falling in love with something that disappears faster than free food at a department meeting. But those tears of joy? Worth it. Nothing says scientific achievement like getting emotionally attached to something that exists for less time than it takes light to travel across a proton.

Does This Mean We Can Build Another Particle Collider Or Not?

Does This Mean We Can Build Another Particle Collider Or Not?
The eternal curse of particle physics: spending billions on a fancy new collider only to get the same boring results. That sad thumbs-up cat is every physicist who secretly hoped to break physics and instead got... *checks notes*... perfect agreement with a 50-year-old theory. AGAIN. Funding committees be like: "So you want another $10 billion to confirm what we already know?" Meanwhile, string theorists are in the corner muttering "just wait until we can smash particles at Planck energy" for the 40th consecutive year.

Just One More Collider Bro

Just One More Collider Bro
Particle physicists are basically that friend who swears they'll find the meaning of life if you just spot them $22 billion for a giant underground ring! 😂 The meme perfectly captures how scientists keep promising groundbreaking discoveries (like solving dark matter!) if we just build ONE MORE collider—each bigger than the last. The image shows the current 27km Large Hadron Collider (LHC) compared to the proposed 100km Future Circular Collider, which is basically the physics community's version of "trust me, this time it'll work!" The desperate "bro please" energy is what makes this hilarious—because deep down, we all know they'll find something cool and then immediately start planning an even BIGGER machine!

Speedy Protons Go Brrrrr

Speedy Protons Go Brrrrr
CERN scientists be like: "Hold my particle accelerator!" The Large Hadron Collider is basically the scientific equivalent of smashing two shopping carts together at supersonic speeds and hoping a new universe falls out. Physicists spend billions of dollars to yeet protons at each other near light speed, then act surprised when they discover exotic particles. It's like cooking by throwing random ingredients into a blender and calling yourself a Michelin chef when something edible comes out. The "Emergency Meeting" is just them frantically trying to explain why they need another few billion to keep playing subatomic bumper cars.

The Infinite Regression Of Smashing Things

The Infinite Regression Of Smashing Things
The endless regression of particle physics in one comic! Scientists start with "big rocks are fundamental" then smash them to find smaller rocks. Then those smaller rocks get smashed to find even tinier rocks. 10,000 iterations later, we're still asking what's truly fundamental while some grad student mutters "whatever was fundamental last week is a clerical error now." This perfectly captures the history of particle physics—from atoms to nuclei to quarks to... who knows what's next? The Large Hadron Collider is basically just a $10 billion rock-smashing machine where physicists keep finding increasingly bizarre subatomic particles and then arguing about whether they're "fundamental" until the next funding cycle.

Just One More Collider Bro

Just One More Collider Bro
Particle physicists are basically the gym bros of science. "Just one more collider bro, I swear this one will find dark matter!" Meanwhile, they're planning a 100km ring that makes the 27km Large Hadron Collider look like a toy. The endless cycle of promising groundbreaking discoveries if we just spend *checks notes* $22 billion on an even bigger circle to smash things together. The desperate "bro please" energy is what really sells it—like that friend who keeps insisting one more protein shake will definitely get them those abs.

Particle Romance At CERN

Particle Romance At CERN
Ever wonder what happens when two particles collide at CERN? Apparently, they turn into adorable doge toys being supervised by a giant Shiba Inu! 🐕 The Large Hadron Collider at CERN smashes particles together at near-light speeds, but I doubt their scientists expected the results to be this cute. Those tiny doge particles are about to kiss under the watchful eyes of their particle accelerator overlord. Next breakthrough physics paper: "Quantum Borknamics: How Subatomic Particles Display Canine Properties When Nobody's Looking." Nobel Prize committee, are you taking notes?

Particle Collision: Shiba Edition

Particle Collision: Shiba Edition
The ultimate particle physics playdate! A giant Shiba Inu (labeled "CERN") is about to boop two tiny Shiba figurines (labeled "PARTICLE" and "PARTICLE"). This is basically what happens at the Large Hadron Collider—except instead of an adorable nose boop, particles smash together at near light speed with catastrophic energy. Who knew high-energy physics could be this cute? Scientists spend billions on particle accelerators when they could've just hired this good boy to make the Higgs boson all along!

Particle Physics For Dummies

Particle Physics For Dummies
The pinnacle of physics dad jokes right here! Someone literally slapped the CERN logo on a person's face and labeled an award trophy as "Particle Particle" and "Large Hadron Collider." It's the physics equivalent of saying "I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV." The meme brilliantly reduces the world's largest and most complex scientific instrument—a 27km underground ring accelerating particles to near light speed—to just... two objects bonking together. Nobel Prize for minimalism!