Our Plans Are Measured In Centuries

The eternal engineering identity crisis! Friends picture us lounging around like The Big Bang Theory cast, while parents proudly imagine us in hard hats reviewing blueprints (because that engineering degree was expensive ). Society sees us as pocket-protector nerds, and potential dates assume we're all stuck in 1980s computer labs. Meanwhile, bosses expect us to MacGyver solutions with duct tape and zip ties, kids think we drive Thomas the Tank Engine, and we're over here fantasizing about building Mars rovers or designing Audis. Reality? Just another human staring at screens, debugging code, and questioning life choices while Excel crashes for the third time today. The gap between expectation and reality is approximately 9.81 m/s² – the exact acceleration at which our dreams fall back to earth!

The ultimate scientific flex! This Venn diagram perfectly captures the academic food chain where physicists reign supreme. According to this diagram, physicists can mock engineers, get paid well, AND be better than chemists—the STEM field trifecta! Meanwhile, mathematicians are stuck just mocking engineers, engineers can't win Nobel Prizes, and chemists... well, they're apparently everyone's punching bag. The center suggests that the ultimate achievement in science is being better than chemists. Whoever made this was definitely a physicist with an axe to grind and a superiority complex the size of a supermassive black hole. The interdepartmental shade is strong with this one!

Engineering professors have mastered the dark art of time dilation—not through relativistic physics, but through holiday homework! They'll casually assign 14 problem sets, 3 design projects, and a textbook to rewrite from memory, then act genuinely surprised when students aren't celebrating. It's like they believe Newton's forgotten law: "For every minute of vacation, there must be an equal and opposite amount of suffering." The cognitive dissonance between "I specifically requested it" and students' mental breakdowns is probably the true renewable energy source powering engineering departments nationwide.

Scientists fighting over temperature scales is peak nerd hierarchy! Fahrenheit and Celsius users are crying in distress while Kelvin smugly reigns as the absolute (pun intended) champion. But then there's Rankine—that forgotten temperature scale that's basically Fahrenheit's weird cousin who starts from absolute zero. Only thermodynamics professors remember it exists, and they're probably the only ones who've ever used it unironically. The ultimate temperature scale showdown where nobody wins except people who enjoy watching scientists argue about arbitrary reference points!

Engineering humor at its finest! When stress hits the yielding point, ductile materials (like our relaxed Tom) just go with the flow and deform without breaking. Meanwhile, brittle materials (poor Jerry) are one stress away from catastrophic failure! This is basically every material scientist during finals week - some bend, others shatter. The yielding point is that critical threshold where a material stops bouncing back and starts permanently deforming. Metals like copper? Super chill, just stretching out. Ceramics and glass? Total panic mode! Next time your friend handles stress well, call them "impressively ductile" and watch their confusion!

The eternal battle between perfectionism and practicality! Electrical engineers sobbing uncontrollably at the mere suggestion of using pre-made solutions while the rest of the engineering world casually drops in an Arduino and calls it a day. The electrical engineer's soul is physically wounded by the thought of not designing custom PCB boards from scratch—it's like suggesting a gourmet chef use instant ramen. Meanwhile, other engineers are living their best lives in plug-and-play paradise. This is why project timelines mysteriously triple whenever an EE joins the team!