Be Water My Friend

Engineering students experiencing a moment of pure relief! While everyone else is avoiding human contact to prevent virus spread, engineers are living their best life because they were social distancing before it was cool! The stereotype of engineers having minimal social interaction isn't just a joke—it's their superpower during a pandemic! Nature's way of saying "your countless hours coding alone in your dorm room have prepared you for this moment!"

Engineering exams have evolved dramatically! Grandma's reminiscing about the ancient ritual of pencil-and-paper Professional Engineering civil exams, while her descendant gently suggests it's time for medication and rest. Those PE exams were legendary 8-hour marathons of structural calculations and code compliance that could break even the strongest engineer's spirit. Today's engineers face digital testing platforms but still suffer the same existential dread. Some things in engineering never change—just the delivery method of the trauma!

Nothing says "I'm socially awkward but technically correct" like dropping anatomical engineering facts at the bar. The poor guy just wanted to enjoy his beer, but instead got an unsolicited lecture on penile hydraulics. This is exactly why scientists don't get invited to parties twice. Next time you're tempted to share that fascinating fluid dynamics tidbit, maybe wait until at least the second round of drinks.

Nuclear power plants: *Split atoms to generate electricity* Meanwhile, the actual mechanism: "BEHOLD! I have harnessed the godlike power of nuclear fission... to make water go brrrrr!" 💦☢️ That's right! For all our technological wizardry, nuclear reactors are essentially $7 billion kettles. We're using the most powerful energy source known to humanity to... heat water. The same thing your grandma does with a $20 electric kettle from Target! It's like using a supernova to toast your bread. MAGNIFICENT OVERKILL!

Squidward peering through the blinds at SpongeBob and Patrick having fun is the perfect metaphor for engineering students watching their friends graduate on time. While humanities majors are out there celebrating with their diplomas, engineering students are still wrestling with thermodynamics and differential equations in year 6. The five-year plan turned into a seven-year reality check! That's not a degree—it's a hostage situation with student loans as the ransom.

Nothing quite captures the existential crisis of academia like a thermodynamics professor whose students are breaking the second law of academic effort. With an average grade of F and students who treat attendance like it's optional, this poor soul is experiencing more entropy than the systems they teach about. That desperate plea about NPP (Nuclear Power Plants) versus industry jobs isn't just concern—it's the sound of someone watching their life's work evaporate faster than an unstable isotope. The professor's email is basically thermodynamic despair in text form: energy transferred directly from their soul to the void. The true miracle here? Four students somehow scoring 21/21. Either they're brilliant or the professor graded while drinking. Either way, this email is proof that teaching sometimes violates the conservation of sanity.