S P A C E T I M E

Every astronomer upgrading from Hubble to James Webb Space Telescope! The top image shows the iconic Hubble view of the Carina Nebula—already mind-blowing with its cosmic cliffs and stellar nurseries. Then JWST comes along with its infrared capabilities revealing previously hidden star formation and cosmic structure with ridiculous clarity. Astronomers literally went from "wow, the universe is beautiful" to "HOLY COSMIC RADIATION, I CAN SEE THE ACTUAL STELLAR EMBRYOS FORMING." It's like trading in your trusty 90s flip phone for the latest smartphone and suddenly realizing you've been missing 99% of reality. No wonder astronomers couldn't sleep when those first JWST images dropped!

Stellar physics humor at its darkest. If a black hole had the same mass as our sun (a solar mass black hole), its event horizon would be about 6 km across—roughly the size of a small city. But if it had the same diameter as the sun? The density would be catastrophic, and we'd all be spaghettified before we could finish calculating the gravitational forces. The facial expressions perfectly capture the existential terror of realizing that astrophysics problems aren't just theoretical anymore.

The physics here is absolutely magnificent ! A shrunken moon would still maintain its original mass (conservation of mass, folks!) but with drastically reduced volume. This creates an object with density comparable to a neutron star! Throwing this ultra-dense mini-moon would create an impact equivalent to millions of nuclear bombs. The atmospheric entry? That's where it gets spicy! The mini-moon would generate so much friction it would create a plasma sheath hot enough to ionize air molecules. But unlike typical meteors, its extreme density means it wouldn't lose much mass during entry. Earth would essentially get punched by a cosmic bowling ball with the mass of our actual moon. So would it burn up? Not even close. We'd be looking at an extinction-level event that makes dinosaurs feel lucky. Gru's villainous plan is basically "advanced planetary destruction with extra steps."

Fascinating. Someone who thinks the absence of atmospheric light scattering is evidence of a film studio. Next they'll tell us astronauts float because they're hanging from invisible strings. The irony is that without an atmosphere to scatter light, you'd expect exactly what we see - a bright sun against a black backdrop. But sure, NASA hired Stanley Kubrick to fake the moon landing and he insisted on shooting on location.

Conspiracy theorists: "The moon landing was staged!" Engineers who designed multi-stage rockets: "Yes, that's literally how orbital mechanics works. We stage the rockets to shed mass and increase efficiency. It's basic Tsiolkovsky rocket equation stuff. Did you think we'd just... point a single tube at the moon and hope for the best?"

That tiny speck labeled "2024 YR4" is an asteroid NASA's tracking, and the title "At This Point I Would Welcome It" is peak millennial/Gen-Z nihilism. Looking at a potential extinction-level event and thinking "finally, a solution to my student loans!" After decades of teaching undergrads, I'm not entirely unsympathetic. Nothing says "I'm done with this experiment" like a cosmic reset button. The dinosaurs never had to grade papers or attend faculty meetings, so maybe they were the lucky ones.