Planetary defense Memes

Cosmic wingman Jupiter coming in clutch! The meme perfectly captures our solar system's dynamics - Jupiter's massive gravitational field acts as Earth's celestial bodyguard, deflecting potentially catastrophic asteroids. Without this gas giant bro intercepting space rocks, Earth would be getting hit on WAY too often (and not in the fun way). Jupiter basically absorbs the cosmic equivalent of bad pickup lines so we can continue existing. Next time you look up at that striped behemoth, give it a nod of appreciation for its 4.5 billion years of stellar wingmanning!

The cosmic hands of denial won't save us! 500,000 kilometers might sound like a safe distance, but that's actually closer than the Moon (384,400 km away). In astronomical terms, that's like a bullet passing through your cosmic hair. The space vest isn't just fashion—it's irony incarnate. "Don't worry, we're FINE," says the astrophysicist while internally calculating our extinction probability. Next time NASA says "close approach," just remember this is space-speak for "technically missed us but let's not talk about how statistically terrifying that actually was."