Green energy Memes

Peak Dunning-Kruger effect in its natural habitat! Our confident butcher friend here believes he's outsmarted renewable energy engineers with his "groundbreaking" discovery that wind turbines must become energy vampires 50% of the time. Little does he know that wind turbines are designed to rotate and face the wind direction (that's what those motors at the top do). They literally have wind vanes and yaw drives that continuously adjust the turbine position to maximize efficiency. Engineers spent decades perfecting this technology while he was perfecting his pork chop technique. It's like claiming cars would drive backward half the time because "statistically 50% of roads go the other direction."

Finally, a renewable energy solution with real bite ! The vampire-powered piston engine represents the perfect marriage of mythological exploitation and thermodynamic principles. Spray holy water, vampire turns to dust (compression stroke), inject blood, vampire regenerates (power stroke). It's essentially a biological Stirling engine with fangs. The beauty is in the details—"piston knock" caused by unmatched vampire regeneration rates is a legitimate engineering concern. And the claim that vampires are "universally available" might be the most optimistic assumption in renewable energy research I've encountered in my 40 years of teaching. Who needs solar panels when you've got the undead? Just don't tell the ethics committee about your fuel source.