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Poor Pluto out here catching strays harder than it catches Neptune's gravitational influence! The meme brilliantly roasts Pluto's planetary status with scientific precision. The "my very educated mother just served us nine pizzas" mnemonic reference is particularly savage—remember when that final P actually meant something? Pluto's bizarre orbit crossing Neptune's path is the celestial equivalent of cutting in line at the cosmic cafeteria. And that size comparison with our Moon? Brutal. Pluto's basically that friend who keeps insisting they're 6 feet tall on dating apps when everyone knows they're 5'7". The "If and when but never is" bit hits harder than a micrometeorite impact. Since its demotion in 2006, Pluto's been the astronomical equivalent of that person still using their ex's Netflix account years after the breakup. The planetoid is literally begging for validation with its "Give me liberty, Give me fire, Give me a tail Or I retire" plea—like a celestial midlife crisis.

Mercury's out here with the celestial equivalent of a PowerPoint presentation defending its planetary status. "I'm round! I orbit the Sun! I'm in that mnemonic device about planets!" Meanwhile, it's conveniently glossing over the fact that it can't even organize its day-night schedule properly and needs its orbital mommy for cleanup. The comparison to Ganymede is particularly brutal - like showing up to a job interview and finding out the other candidate has the same qualifications but also speaks five languages and volunteers at animal shelters. The "give me liberty or give me core" bit is just *chef's kiss* - planetary existential crisis in four lines. Next thing you know, Mercury will be posting inspirational quotes about "living your best orbit" while blocking all the dwarf planets on social media.